It’s been 7 months since I posted our news that we were expecting again for the 7th time in Nine will be fine. It has been a time of inner reflection for me. Our family has experienced many ups and downs. In some ways the time has dragged on and on and in others, it has flown by.
Had someone asked my at the beginning of 2010 if I thought I’d be welcoming 2011 with a new Edgling, I would have laughed. Yet here I am, four days overdue, having lived with the strangest sense of deja vu for the last nine months. After seven times, it just all seems very familiar and the pregnancies began to run together. I calculated that I have been pregnant for well over five years!
In my original post, I was struggling with adding another baby to the family. It felt like going backwards. Everyone in the house could dress and feed themselves. Gone was most of the baby paraphernalia, we were almost out of diapers altogether, leaving the house was easier. Then we drew the Go Back to Start card and rewound all of that. Back comes the stuff, the sleepless nights, the feeding, changing…
…and the snuggling and the cooing and the excitement over each milestone, the joy of watching older siblings interact with a little one. Just like in a board game when you go back to start, you may feel like you’re starting over, but you’re also getting a chance to hit all the good spaces again. That’s what God’s been reminding me. That this appointment was divine – it has been all the time. It just took me a minute, or two, to see it.
So now I find myself impatiently glancing at the baby bed in the corner, wishing there was a warm little bundle already there, ready to see what this time around the board has in store.