Archive for the ‘Observations on Life’ Category

Nine is Divine

It’s been 7 months since I posted our news that we were expecting again for the 7th time in Nine will be fine. It has been a time of inner reflection for me. Our family has experienced many ups and downs. In some ways the time has dragged on and on and in others, it has flown by.

Had someone asked my at the beginning of 2010  if I thought I’d be welcoming 2011 with a new Edgling, I would have laughed. Yet here I am, four days overdue, having lived with the strangest sense of deja vu for the last nine months. After seven times, it just all seems very familiar and the pregnancies began to run together.  I calculated that I have been pregnant for well over five years!

In my original post, I was struggling with adding another baby to the family. It felt like going backwards. Everyone in the house could dress and feed themselves. Gone was most of the baby paraphernalia, we were almost out of diapers altogether, leaving the house was easier. Then we drew the Go Back to Start card and rewound all of that. Back comes the stuff, the sleepless nights, the feeding, changing…

…and the snuggling and the cooing and the excitement over each milestone, the joy of watching older siblings interact with a little one.  Just like in a board game when you go back to start, you may feel like you’re starting over, but you’re also getting a chance to hit all the good spaces again.  That’s what God’s been reminding me. That this appointment was divine – it has been all the time.  It just took me a minute, or two, to see it.

So now I find myself impatiently glancing at the baby bed in the corner, wishing there was a warm little bundle already there, ready to see what this time around the board has in store.

Nanny’s Gifts

A photo of us on my wedding day, beside one of her many teacups.

January has not been kind in the area of loss. 3 out of the last 4 years have found us welcoming the New Year while saying good bye to a loved one. A year ago today, I received an unexpected call from my mom that my Nanny has passed away in her sleep of an apparent heart attack. It was just a few days after her birthday. Ice storms had prevented the family from getting together with her that weekend. I had mailed a card, but I am sad to say, I hadn’t called her yet, for reasons that escape me now.

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A couple of weeks ago, I was putting together a photo book and while sifting through the many pictures on my computer, I was struck between the eyes with how utterly blessed we have been.  Looking back over 2010, I was reminded that though we have had many challenges this year, we have also had many triumphs – some grand and some everyday.  A few poignant events stood out amidst the holidays and birthdays, school and sports and general busyness of a family of eight, though, and I thought I’d share them this week.

First up, Nanny’s Gifts.

Big cook – nesting edition

For the past six weeks or so, I have had to put one of nature’s strongest instincts on hold for the holidays.  My mind was furiously making lists of things needed to do to make things just right to welcome a new baby, but I simply had to wait until I made it through everything that goes with having lots of kids at Christmas. There were plays and baking, shopping, wrapping, company and parties and as I look back, I’m not sure how I made it 😉  It was a grand time though! Continue reading

Nine will be fine

I could have titled this seven will be heaven, since that’s how many Edglings there will be come January ~ but rhyming  fine with the total number that will be in our family sounded better right now since I am still in a wee bit of shock and heaven isn’t exactly where I’m at yet.

I’ve been here before.  This time has been a little different though.  For the last year or so, I’ve been walking the road of saying goodbye to new babies and giving birth.  No more sweet bundles or deliciously scented heads to smell.  No more watching siblings take to and love a new little one.  It was hard at first, but little by little, it got easier. I thought of all that we would be able to do without diapers, strollers and the works.  We started taking steps to make things permanent. I’ve struggled with cutting off God’s blessing in this area, but finally felt comfortable moving into a new phase, child-bearing years behind me.

We weren’t aware of any oops, until the time came and went. And denial set in, along with nausea, fatigue and congestion.  And depression.  So many plans I had for the upcoming year – some selfish, but many with my loved ones in mind – helping my senior with college plans, redoing the school room, getting away with hubby, getting in shape again.  How will I accomplish those things, along with the everyday and carry a baby? I’m not as young as I used to be 🙂 We don’t even have a vehicle big enough to carry us all!

The truth is, I don’t know.  Some of those may not happen.  Some may look different.  But I know that if anything is to be accomplished, it will be with only by the strength and through the grace of God. Because that’s the only way I’ve ever been able to do it before.  It’s His plan and He will see it through.

Bill has been great.  He and I have sort of switched places from earlier years. Now I’m the shocked one and he is the one who takes it in stride and holds me up.  The kids are happy for the most part.  They just keep rolling. The 4-year-old asked at bedtime if the baby would be here tomorrow.  I think we’ll have to make a paper chain to help her count the days.  That’s going to be one looooong chain.

Me ~ I’m adjusting.  So if you’d be so kind if you see me not to ask me if we figured out  how this happens.  Obviously we have 🙂  And I won’t ask you if you’ve figured out what makes you overweight or in debt or rude.  That sounds harsh, but if you think about it, people feel like they can ask or say whatever when you’re pregnant, that they would never dream of saying any other time. And when you’re still dealing with the revelation yourself, it’s kind of tough to answer without hauling off and smacking some people. And I am not prone to violence.

If it were up to me, right now, I would cocoon myself , not come out for nine months and then just send out baby announcements. (It would be so awesome!) That’s kind of hard to do when you’re surrounded by friends and family and already have six kids who wouldn’t take well to being locked up with you.

We have shared our news in many ways with each baby, making it special.  This time, I decided that the blanket approach would work best for me. A baby blanket if you will.  Thank you Facebook for making this possible.  Family will have to forgive me for not making personal calls.  I just can’t do it (see above).  If you’re thrilled, feel free to comment, call, send meals 😉  If you’re shocked, just sit on it for awhile and when you’re ready, when you’ve adjusted, then I’d be happy to take your call.

Just remember, there are many other things that are a lot harder to adjust to  than a sweet baby made in the image of our Creator.

I know I will.

Like a glove

I hopped in the van the other night to pick up the oldest from a friend’s and it was COLD.  I would say really cold, but any northerners reading this would laugh hysterically since it was only about 30 degrees.  Anyway, I had actually remembered to put my gloves on before I left the house.  Normally I would have retrieved them from my coat pocket when my ‘pingers’ started getting numb and it would have taken awhile for them to warm back up. Worse, the cold would have crept to the rest of my body and I would have been a chattering monkey for most of the drive. Continue reading

Forgetting what is behind…

In Philippians, Paul writes about wanting to know Christ and the power of his resurrection, becoming like him in his death in order to attain resurrection from the dead.  He admits that he hasn’t yet attained this, but that forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, he presses on toward the goal to win the prize for which God called him heavenward in Christ Jesus.

I don’t have a problem with the straining toward what’s ahead or pressing on for the prize, it’s the forgetting what’s behind where I get stuck.  Continue reading